Motherhood is a glorious, exhilarating, and fulfilling journey. It’s also exhausting. When a mother says she’s tired, she’s not really telling the whole story. She’s weary. She’s physically drained. She doesn’t want to be touched anymore. And while she desperately wants to be needed – and dreads the day her children don’t need her anymore – she also wants five minutes to herself. It truly is an emotional burden. A heavy one.
It doesn’t matter what kind of life you lead as a mother, you will have these moments. Whether it’s at 5 am or 9 am, all day or after work, one weekend a month or every single day, you will feel tired.
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To add to the weariness of motherhood, there is an incredible emotional burden. You strive to do everything right. To keep a spotless house, full of educational and eco-friendly toys. You desire to cook your children healthy, but fun meals. You want to make your children happy by taking them to every birthday party and sporting event, but you also want to keep them safe in a little bubble.
These are the glorious days of motherhood. The emotionally exhausting days of motherhood. But there is hope for you, mama! Hope for all of us. There are a few things you can do to ease the emotional burden. Since you don’t have time to get lost on Pinterest finding and figuring them out, we’ve made you a simple list right here.
5 Ways to Ease the Emotional Burdens
Let it go
No, don’t put Frozen on again (unless you need to take a shower). But let some of the craziness go. You do NOT have to make homemade Valentine’s Day gifts for every kid in your child’s class. You do NOT have to plan an elaborate homemade meal for dinner tonight. You do NOT have to plan a birthday party this year. Here’s what you need to do: take care of yourself and take care of your family. The end.
Pour a Cuppa
The simple act of making a cup of tea (or coffee) is refreshing. Try doing only that. Don’t clean up the kitchen while the water boils. Don’t check your email in those few brewing minutes. Simply stand in the kitchen, savoring the quiet, and breathe. If you can swing it, savor your coffee and watch a show that makes you happy. We’re partial to Downton Abbey and Call the Midwife, but you do you.
We know you really can’t let it all go, but you can decide what is important. You may feel guilty about not being able to chaperone your child’s field trip, but another parent may be dying to do it, so let them. You are allowed to pick and choose what you do based on what makes you happy or stress-free, so let yourself do that! Do you want to coach your child’s basketball team? Then do it! However, for dinner on those nights, eat cereal so you can enjoy being the coach and not feel stressed when you get home.
Ask for help
Your spouse may not always be around or able to help with everything, but surely there are some things he or she can take off your plate. Here’s the key though: let your spouse do it his or her way. If your spouse offers to do laundry, do not, do NOT, DO NOT criticize the way he or she folds the towels. Accept the help, say thanks, and re-read tip #1.
Writing down the things you are grateful for is a powerful tool. On bad days, taking the time to focus on three things that went well can turn the day around. In a few years, you may look back and remember the day your toddler said “I love you” for the first time or the day your teenager decided to cuddle up and read with you in the evening. You may remember the time your spouse made dinner and sent you to bed early. Write it down and reflect on the good times.
All You Need Is Love
Here’s the bottom line, mama: Motherhood is hard. It is tiring. You are going to have days when you feel like you have it all together and days where the world is falling apart around you. But look into your child’s little eyes, the ones who stare up at you with so much love you’re certain your heart will literally explode. That love can ease the emotional burden like nothing else. That’s where your focus should be; not on dishes or Christmas cards or a clean house — but on pouring love into those little bodies.
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